A small thanksgiving dinner for 4 this year. Steve, Tanya, Charlie and myself. I prepared my first turkey with stuffing. My first baked macaroni and cheese from scratch. My first fruit salad and cherry cobbler for desert. All in all my first thanksgiving feast was a success.
Posts Tagged ‘Family’
Today someone asked me what or who inspires me. After a lot of thinking one person came to mind…..My little sister.
She is the most amazing mother and wife I have ever met. She married young and became a mom right away, giving up the freedoms and party liberties most people in their 20’s enjoy. She is now 26 with 3 beautiful children and she has been trying to get her body back to what it was pre-pregnancy. She is down to 126 lbs!!! The fact that she finds time to work out after juggling her job, 3 little kids, and marriage is beyond me. I am so proud of you!
My brother in law is an Active Duty Army man who will be deployed to his 2nd tour in Iraq this year. The fact that my sister can still get out of bed is beyond me. She is a STRONG woman, inside and out! She does what she can to stay close to her family as well as instill good morals to her children, teaching them to be respectful and well behaved little people.
She is a great sister. Always there for me when I need her. All she wants from me is my time. Time to spend with her and the kids. She is a selfless person giving everything to the kiddos. Always forgoing any clothes for her so that her kids can have their Polo shirts and brand new sneakers.
Te quiero Manita!
We go through phases in life. The awkward teen years, the college life, the post college life where we are totally lost, the first job, the second job, the career- where we enter our businesswoman era… then what? You start thinking about whether or not you are ready for a life that is spent as a wife and mother of kids. Now….. don’t get the wrong idea.
I am not saying that its not something I would ever consider. But its a scary thought isn’t it??
Lately, I have found myself wondering what kind of mother I would be if I decided to have children. I believe that I would fall so in love with my little one, that my ideas and plans on how my life is supposed to look like would go out the window. Would I be over protective, too strict, or scared out of my mind?
Also, how many kids is too many? If you would have asked me this question 2 years ago my answer would have been ‘one’. HAHA :p
Then I said, ok maybe one. But then is that fair to the child? Having no one to play with and risking them to be snobby brats? Who knows. I guess when the time comes, you will figure it out. But let me get back to the reason for this post…. I am spending time with my family for easter weekend, and I find myself having dinner with 4 adults and 5 kids (3 of which are under the age of 3). This was enough to show me I am not ready… or at least scare me into thinking so. They require alot of work. One requires alot of attention, imagine 2 or 3?? I am a neat freak…. you cant have a neat and set house and have little ones running around. At least not without the help of a housekeeper or nanny.
You give up dining in fancy restaurants with the family, because the kids either create too much mess or too much noise. You give up your 8-10 hours nights of sleep. You give up nights with just you and your husband. But then whats the trade off? A night with you, your husband, and your little one. Sounds kinda nice doesnt it? And while you give up parts of your old life, you gain new parts in their place. Just try your hardest not to be one of THOSE parents you always whisper about…. you know who I’m talking about LOL… the ones you criticized at the restaurant etc..
I’m thinking there need to be rules when becoming a parent. I give mad props to all the parents out there. It takes patience, never ending love, and hard work to raise a child. Did I mention patience?? HAHA
#1- No going to the movies with kids under 6 years old
#2- No dining in 4-5 star restaurants with the kids.
#3- No breast feeding in public places
#4- No changing diapers in the mall
This list will continue on…. any help??
” Everyone has their baggage, their demons and their pasts, but its how you decide to fight them, forget them, or live with them that helps define who you are a person.” God give me strength.
Sometimes we forget that family is about trust, consideration, honesty and love. When you have a family or are part of one…. you are no longer a lone entity. What you do affects others whether you think it does or not. If you spend too much time at work, you may be neglecting your kids, or your wife. If you spend your time partying with friends and are too busy socializing, you are neglecting your parents, or your younger siblings. If you spend too much time with one parent, you may be neglecting the relationship with the other. You kinda get my point….
The thing is, we can never make someone 100% happy, because there is only so much of you to go around. But the thing is you should at least TRY to spend time with the people that will be a part of your life forever….. no matter what may come your way. If your grandparents, parents or siblings live far away, make sure to call them and check in. Stay in touch with each others lives and share your news. But do it in all aspects of your life. Don’t simply call when something is wrong, or you are having a bad day to vent. Share that you met someone new or that work is going really well, or that you miss them. If you only call when there is bad news or something bothering you, you become the bearer of bad news and the person who always brings everyone down. No one wants to be that person.
All families argue… that’s normal. Think about when you were a teenager and thought you were invisible and your parents had no clue. Now fast forward 10- 12 years. You see things a little differently don’t you? You begin to see that your parents had good intentions and they were only trying to protect you. They may have not been right about everything… but they were right about alot of things. And if they happened to be wrong? Well then, the parent learned from that experience and hopefully grew from it as a person.
Now as adults, we do the same for our parents. We sometimes try to protect them from themselves and the dangers they may not see in front of them…. and what do they do??? They react like the ungrateful teenager you used to be. Funny how the tables turn sometimes. When families fight and emotions are flaring, the brain does not fully process the entire situation simply because your heart and your emotions are clouding your judgment and not allowing you to see the WHOLE situation. At the time of an argument, you only see YOUR point of view. It takes time to step away and see all aspects to realize a true logistical solution to your problem.
People will argue and disagree…. that’s just part of who we are. We are all built differently, with different emotional and physical builds. We all react to situations differently, we all have have our opinions. Its not until you put yourself in the other person’s shoes that you will realize whether you were right or wrong…. or both were wrong. That’s the beauty and torture of family….. you are all different people.
I leave you with these quotes to put things in perspective:
Families are like fudge – mostly sweet with a few nuts. ~Author Unknown
The thing about family disasters is that you never have to wait long before the next one puts the previous one into perspective. ~Robert Brault
When our relatives are at home, we have to think of all their good points or it would be impossible to endure them. ~George Bernard Shaw
Family quarrels are bitter things. They don’t go by any rules. They’re not like aches or wounds; they’re more like splits in the skin that won’t heal because there’s not enough material. ~F. Scott Fitzgerald
Family is just accident…. They don’t mean to get on your nerves. They don’t even mean to be your family, they just are. ~Marsha Norman
If the family were a fruit, it would be an orange, a circle of sections, held together but separable – each segment distinct. ~Letty Cottin Pogrebin
and last but not least:
You don’t choose your family. They are God’s gift to you, as you are to them. ~Desmond Tutu